Neil McFarlane (2)

You may remember McFarlane from last year's programme. He returns triumphantly to his safe place at the Ring O' Bells on April the 2nd.

Sticking to the same trying and testing formula as in previous variably successful years, his 2015 show is named as loosely as possible in order to allow him to say pretty much any old wee-wee that comes into his head.

The one thing which is guaranteed is that it won't all be true but most of it will be butt-worryingly ribald. Life, love, literature, lewdness and loo-roll, it's all here somewhere.

So come along - quaff a flagon of finest ale, sit down and shut up. And do at least try to enjoy yourself.